A short lesson on accountability

Taking accountability is a crucial trait that humans need to practice more often. It is exhausting to hold people accountable for their actions, to explain to them why their behavior was wrong and to hope that they will not repeat it. It’s frustrating to constantly think, “I wish they would just do better” and wonder if the same thing will happen again.

And when I say “wonder” I’m not manifesting for mistakes-that-lead-to-my-hurt to occur again. But it seems the universe tends to see it that way. I’ve only experienced dissapointment so many times, that I can create a report with references and a chart that represents “Names” on the X axis and “Number of Dissapointments” on the Y axis.

Why do our loved ones take advantage of our kindness? Why do our friends think of themselves before they think of others? Why do they not see that their actions can inflict long-term mental wounds that leave you in a confused and angered state. Even if I confront a problem, there are very few who will actively listen and do better. Based on my experience, people normally tend to fall back into their old patterns.

And boy oh boy, do old patterns die hard. I’ve left my mind to ponder about questions I will never have answers to. “There are some questions we should leave unanswered,” that is what I’ve read online. But I WANT answers. I NEED answers. The relationship is still pending, so what I want is for people to THINK THINGS THROUGH. I can’t be the only person who wants this, am I?

You might be thinking, “You care too much” or “Maybe you are overthinking things,” but that still doesn’t help me get closer to any kind of reassurance that things will change. So, how do we hold people accountable for their actions? Do we measure their progress? Do we hold performance reviews? Do we put them though different focus groups? Maybe a business approach to personal relationships is needed. After all, we give and they take.

Accountability does not end with apologies, that’s only when it begins. I will no longer make excuses for others’ inactions, ill actions, or misactions. You shouldn’t have to either. Look at what we are left with when we do. Empty hands, broken hearts, and bruised spirits. To give kindness and be handed back anger, dissapointment, and trust issues is not a fair trade.

Thank you for joining today’s lesson with your everyday girl,

Sara